Premature ageing is largely caused by sun. As is, uh, skin cancer.
And as Fruity wants you as fresh and pretty and cancer-free as possible, i'm launching my SAVE YOUR FRICKEN SKIN campaign.
After all, what good is me meeting all of these wonderful experts and learning all of these clever and scary things if i don't tell you guys about them? NONE GOOD.
I'm starting this today, because it's my last day in the office, and as I will be, I'm betting you too will be frolicking around in the sun during the next two weeks. That is if you live in Australia, and you subscribe to the National Stop Work Convention which runs from just before Baby Jesus' Birthday right through to the second week in January, by which time your new years' resolution to run at least three times a week and give up the darts has already fallen into the abyss of Lost Resolutions. (A large pit said to be near Canberra.)
So, to prevent you
A. Getting skin cancer
B. Looking ten years older than you really are
C. From losing your beautiful skin
I'm going to explain SPF to you. ( I didn't know how it worked till a few months back, so i'm guessing you won't either. Presumptuous is my favourite colour.)
First important thing: Everyone has a burn time, which is how long you can last in the sun until your skin reddens. Fair skinned humans in 'Straya usually get less than five minutes. Fruity is olive-skinned, but she still only lasts around 10 minutes.
Second important thing: The SPF number concerns time, not strength. SPF 30 is not stronger than SPF 15, it just means you get 30 times your burn time of sun protection, whereas with SPF 15, you only get 15 times your burn time.
Third important thing: Lather it in sunscreen it every day, but still never expose your face to the sun. Dumb.
Fourth important thing: Everyone has a maximum sun exposure time per 24 hours. That's it. No more. You find this by multiplying your burn time (so, mine is 10 minutes) by the sun protection you use (I always use SPF 30). Which in my case, gives me a maximum sun exposure time of THREE HUNDRED MINUTES.
Clinique explains this rather complex idea using the Chicken Theory, which I loved so much I stole to use here: 
Let's say a chicken takes an hour to bake. If you put a chicken in marinade and cook it for 50 minutes, then remove it to re-baste, IT WILL STILL BE COOKED IN TEN MINUTES TIME. You don't get another hour of cooking time just cause you re-basted. At one hour, that bird is cooked. And any more time in the oven will just burn it.
How this relates to you: Your maximum sun exposure time is your chicken time. So, once you've reached your sun exposure for the day, that's it. You don't get anymore; your skin can't deal with anymore. Not even if you re-apply more sunscreen. (Re-applying only replaces your protection barrier after swimming or sweating - it doesn't give you more time.)
The only time you get a clean slate for more sun exposure is after the hours of 12am and 4am, which is when your skin cells regenerate.
Not by going inside for lunch, or having a kip, or going to see The Holiday, but after your body has had a chance to process and try and cope with the free-radical damage you've already hurled at it the day before. But that's another post.
Gosh, too much maths and poultry.
I'm exhausted.
More SAVE YOUR FRICKEN SKIN tips tomorrow.
Confused? Me too! Hit comments below and we'll get un-confused together.
