fruitybeauty

Git down to Salon Nwah

On another note (F Minor) don't forget to sign up to Primped for a trip for you and a friend/boyfriend/psycho detox maniac pal to shimmy on up to the Golden Door for five nights (a prize worth roughly as much as my car financially, and as much as Donald Trump's car mentally/physically).

Antigone: Sings, dances; has great hair.

My sister Antigone, is a very clever lady. If you look up clever in wikipedia, it says, See: Antigone Foster.

I haven't actually checked that, but I'm pretty sure it does. I'm pretty much always 100% accurate when I make stuff up. Anyway, so she's a singer/songwriter/performer/fox, and her voice will probably already be familiar to you, because her stage name is Brian McFadden. Haha! But seriously, it's Enrique Iglesias.

No, no, no, she sang this song, which you would definitely know, and this one too, which you would also know, if you ever listened to awesome music at any point over the last couple of years.

But she's now gone solo, after hauling buttock to the UK and she's just dropped her first solo track, More Man Than Man, which is already a Top 10 UK Club chart hit, and which is catchier than than a one year old with a cold.

Check it out, Fruits. Check it out and try not to get that hook embedded into your noggin.

Hints and tricks and a brand new flick.

Yes, I've already gibbered to camera about this. *Crowd hisses* But you guys know that if I'm prepared to bang on about something more than once, it's definitely Definitely Excellent.

Disclaimer: I tried for hours, hours to upload this to SpewTube, but like a trustafarian with skinny frappaccinos to sip and convertibles to drive, it refused to work. Their loss; Tinypic's picking up the slack. How much more fun is their logo anyway? WAY more fun, is how much. Good little Tinypic. Clever little Tinypic.

Moisture in a stick, that's the trick.

And now for something frrresh.

Here's the one I mention in the Definitely Excellent Review, but didn't have on me whilst ugging gaily around the countryside. It's a life saver (forget CPR, just use this) for dry faces or a chapped nose, or dry knees; whatever. I especially love to pull him out when I see those little fine line-y, laughter line-y lines come up around my eyes. I just dab this gear on and they're GONE, filled with moisture and dewiness. It's about $20 bucks from Priceline.

Oily, happy skin is not an oxymoron.

Appearing without makeup on YouTube and your blog sure is a liberating little ride. Lucky then, that my skin is glowy and happy from the oils I'm dribbling about then, isn't it!

(If you believe that was an accident then you are a FOOL. If my skin looked rubbish as I talked about how wonderful these oils made it look, this video would've never have made it past the 'Save or Delete' stage. )

Revlon gets bold with Limited Edition collection: People not very good at applying makeup suddenly looking amazing.

Seen the visuals for Revlon's Limited Edition around yet?

No?
Oh, you will.

And probably, you'll be all like, "HEY. Where's Katie Bos-Bos? Where's Halle Berrylicious? Where's Eva Mendybum? Have Revlon gone MAD? Have they gone all trendy and fashion-y and FORGOTTEN THEIR ROOTS??"

NO, fruits.

It's a Limited Edition range. A little side-project. And flying fruit platters, it is good. In fact, it is so cool, and of such high quality, and so violently on trend, that they've deliberately kept it visually removed from classic Revlon so you know just how different and special it be.

Now. Watch the Longest EVER Definitely Excellent product review for Fruity's highlights.
At the same time, watch the collection sell out in 34. 3 seconds.
(Difficult logistically, but I believe in you.)

Yes: I realise the stupidity of talking about the colour of nail polish while filming in black and white.

Because hormonal breakouts are DULL.

"I powder very, very good."

Well Hello!

I want you to meet my Beauty and Style Inspiration. (Audrey Hepburn who?)

So wise, and yet so violently attractive: How can this be?

Watch and learn, fruits, watch and learn.

You will learn about fashion... It might be ostrich feathers, or a fox draped over the shoulder, puffed sleeves ("particularly interesting") a ("Very Dramatic") gold foil dress or even just a splash of leather ("Leather is always great - I wear a lot of it") but believe me, you will be up to 2.4 times more glamorous after seeing Brenda work her wardrobe.

Makeup? Forget all those tricky shade-perfecting foundations and concealers: There are only three shades: "Light, medium and dark". And blush? Pick a shade: There's pink, orange,  "real real dark orange" and burgundy. As for sexing things up at night? Switch from a black pencil, to a black liner. "At night I'll use a line. A BLACK line." Very glamorous.

Ah, fruits. So many things to learn, so little time in 1987 to try them all.

Your face! It's FILTHY!

Serious part
Dermalogica precleanse is an irritant-free, plant-based cleansing oil that rids your skin of excess oil, makeup (especially the long-last gear), sunscreens and all manner of nasty pollutants that cling to your skin through the day/night.

Silly part
It makes me skin real nice and clean.

One more thing
I haven't posted a video for a while as my N73 was unceremoniously dropped on hard cement Christmas day. I have him back now. But not my skills, it would appear. Listen to that GIBBER, would you. Cheeses!

Hybrid bronzers. Hybrid blush. WHATEVER.

Still carrying 'round a blush, a bronzer and an illuminator in that crazy-heavy handbag of yours?
Girl, you loco.

Get a hybrid compact and feel the power of super clever makeup wash over you.
(Make sure it's not rain disguised as power. It'll ruin your blowdry. Make your mascara run. )