fruitybeauty

'Sbeen a while, hasn't it Fruits?

But you know why.

It's not because I don't care for you anymore.
And I promise it's not because you spilled nail polish on my new dress that time. It's because of my daily blogging at primped, which being my Real Life, Full Time, Rent Paying, Shoe Buying Job, thieves all of my blogging energy and love and ideas.

It's funny, you know... (Funny weird, not funny like this photo of Meowbert writing his blog, bertybeauty)

...I wrote the "Farewell Fruits" post back in September, but just couldn't bring myself to post it. It's still sitting there as a draft, just being gloomy and throwing shit at the TV and kicking tyres and stuff.

I think it's that I didn't want any finality, because, you know, sometimes I still want to write on here and tell you what I'm up to, and tell you that Origins Pinch Your Cheeks is my favourite product today, (that and Molton Brown Gingerlily bath and shower gel) and most importantly, do what I didn't do two weeks back, which was to wish the two of you reading this a wonderfully happy Christmas break (now irrelevant) and a gloriously happy and successful 2009 (still valid).

With love and gooseberries*
Frosty Fruit.

*This is a real fruit.

For all those who have ever looked at cosmetic packaging and thought, 'Pfft I could do that.'

This is a good competition for you to enter.

Download final_kit_design_award_media_release_april_08.pdf

Kit, that wonderful little mecca (literally) of beauty fun is offering you the chance to design packaging for some limited edition products they're doing. Which, should you win, is a very excellent way for you to start shimmying your way into... whatever the name of the industry is that pertains to designing packaging. (Landscaping? Podiatry?)

As well as winning the luxury of having stuff you've created in shops and online, you also win ten hundred dollar bills and a thousand dollar Kit voucher so that you can buy things featuring packaging that are inferior to your totally amazing designs.

Go here for more details on this competition.
Go here for more details on Jessica Wakefield.
Go here for more details on Croatian Airlines.

Bound to get a shipload of publicity.

Is Dove's new anti-beauty advertisement.

It's amazingly shot and offers a positive message. And after the palaver of my other 'child-related' post, well, that's all I'm willing to say, really.

Oh, and that the little girl at the start is probably as cute as Meowbert, if not moreso.

And that, THAT is all I am willing to say.

Fresh, amazing Missoni goodness up for grabs!

Remember this post? 

It's all about my adoration for Missoni, and their new fragrance Acqua, which has JUST launched.

One cool thing about that post:

The Missoni people in 'Straya sent the link to the Missoni people in NYC, who sent it to the Missoni people in Italy, i.e., Angela Missoni, who liked one of the photos I'd used in my post so much, she asked the Missoni people in NYC to find out where I got it, so she could buy it. Bottom line: Angela Missoni read fruitybeauty.

Another cool thing:

The Missoni people in 'Straya were a little bit chuffed with my Missoni obsession, and gave me FIVE BOTTLES OF THEIR BEAUTIFUL NEW FRAGRANCE, MISSONI ACQUA, as well as ONE, BIG, FAT, BEAUTIFUL MISSONI BEACH TOWEL to give away.

So, there'll be four prizes of the lush new juice...

...and one MEGA, SUPER prize of the juice and the beach towel. And let me tell you, I own one of these towels, and when you strut to the beach with it gently resting on your shoulders, you're pretty much the most fun, (and most designer) cat to hit the sand.

How you can win:

First, you must be a subscriber. Second, post a comment below describing (in less than 25 words, and I'll be counting) the best compliment someone could possibly give you regarding your delicious new Missoni perfume.

The best answer will win the best prize, and the following four will win the penultimate prizes.

Because of the efficiency and professionalism of the Missoni people in Straya, the competition ends this Friday at 12 noon, so that the goods can be sent out on Friday afternoon. How. Good. Is That. Start your engines Fruits...

NB: I am not judging this competition, the Missoni fruits are. But they're a funny lot; they get my humour, so keep on truckin' you funny little fruitbats.

Online beauty fiend? Get a little bit excited, sugar.

You remember how I had that phase of talking up Kit gear all the time? Their wild pop nail polish; their mandarin body wash, their fig body oil, their kite-enthusiast lessons... But then, even though little Kit shops started blossoming in Myer stores around the country, I still kind of felt like I was somehow showing off, because I had access to an actual free-standing store as well as Myer (Oxford St Paddington), and for some of you that was, you know, kind of patronising I guess.

But now, (or rather from September 1) you can ALL buy Kit online. It will be DELIVERED to your home. Or workplace if you're trying to PRETEND to your partner that you don't drop way too much coin online.

And it's not just Kit the actual brand, that's actually only a teeny part of this store (created by Mecca genius, Jo Horgan) . There's a whole fruitbowl of Definitely Excellent niche brands like Scott Barnes, Jemma Kidd, Too Faced, Pop, Cosmedicine , Cowshed, Smiley, Korres, etc etc. Celeb-adored gear, most of it.

This is all sounding way too cash-for-commenty, so I'll finish now, but it'll kind of be the best place you've ever bought stuff for yourself, or your friends, or your cello teacher, ever. Promise. Kind of. Maybe. Shut up.

The address, by the way, is www.kitcosmetics.com
Happy dingin' Friday, Fruits.

It's a welcoming fruit platter! (Maybe go easy on the grapes; terribly bloating.)

Know that feeling you get when you've just left the tarmac in a plane, and your ears are popping and you already need to go to the loo, and you suddenly realise you forget to get your new Marian Keyes book out of the overhead and you're wondering if the guy next to you will possibly consider removing his arm from the communal arm rest at any point during the 13 hour flight and so, bored and slightly agitated, you decide to look out the window and suddenly you're violently aware of the fact that you're really, really, really high?

Yes, well, that's kind of how I felt when I saw how many fresh new fruits logged onto fruitybeauty yesterday.

Extweezeme, is that a light on your plucking instrument?

This is my friend, DF-678. She is a cyborg who has a titanium skeleton and many sci-fi-esque talents, one of which includes being able to shoot small beams of halogen light through her skull so that she may see and pluck stray eyebrow hairs with fierce accuracy.

Of course, I lie. It's Rina, and she is using La-Tweeze, which is a tweezer with an LED light and mirror on the side of the case. Rina tells me with much gesticulation how she loves her clever tweezy tool, because she now doesn't need to rely on natural light to tweeze, and never misses a hair. I personally get my brows waxed, so I don't care much for tweezing, but I definitely see the attraction.

Wow. Deja vu. This post reminds me a little of my post about glosses with lights. Only with more of a cyborg slant. And what could be more fun on a Monday morning than talk of our cyborgian friends? Talk of tweezers with lights, that's what.

Clearly my job here is done.

FOOL! Jessica Alba isn't a Revlon spokesmodel!

Uh, yeah she is.
And Fruity's got the scoop. Seems to be the week for it, huh?
Her first endorsement? The face (and lashes) for Revlon 3D Extreme Mascara. Oooh! Fruity can't wait to see it. Jess burns like toast. Ouch.

So, who does that leave?
Who of the Pretty Young Things isn't yet signed to a cosmetics company?
Aside of the obvious, of course.
(Paula Abdul.)

Topical Fruit

Just like a lovely furry peach that turns putrid and brown, so too is fruitybeauty changing. But in a waaay less rotten way.

Obviously there's been a re-design. (Care of Deanomatic the clever little web wizard who lives with his merry mac maidens in the hamlet of HTML.)

And now, now we're entering a whole new era of bloggy fun with what I'll be calling Topical Fruit. Here's the shakedown on something that, in case you can't tell, is STUPIDLY EXCITING.

• It's what Fruity deems to be the newest and loveliest thing happening in beauty - products, sales or services.
• It's going to be big and juicy with pictures and it'll be perched just there, on that right side bar just near all of your marvelous and thoroughly informed opinions.
• Each Topical Fruit will run for a week at a time.
• It's going to involve competitions which of course means PRIZES! PRIZES! PRIZES!
• But. The competitions are only open to subscribers. (Read between the lines, fruits... Yes, that's right: Waterproof mascara is hard to remove.)

So keep your little eyes (and bananas) peeled.
'Sgonna be fun, as.

Oy.
Want in from the Other End?
Pop a bold name into my inbox.

If you like my bloggy, and you think it's sexeh

Shiny new colours!
Pretty new fonts!
Fun new columns!
A Proper Grown Up logo!
Things still to change and come but we're getting to that so shut up!

I feel like a delicious new blackcurrant perched on a leafy branch, soaked in summer sun and all plump and wonderful and ready to provide lots of goodness.

Man, so MANY fruits I could've gone with there.
Think yourself lucky, Blackcurrant.