'Nice hand cream, where'd you get that?'
'Oh, um that nice flowery place in Westfield, Lochitane.'
HOLD THE PHONE AND STOP THE PRESS AND OTHER URGENT THINGS.
This woman has mispronounced a beauty brand.
Instead of sending her to prison, I decided to help. Because let's face it, there's NOTHING worse, not even losing your dog or civil war, than looking like a fool when you pronounce 'La Prairie' incorrectly. I remember this one awful time I served my guests Krug that wasn't quite chilled enough, and let me tell you, terribly humiliating as that was, incorrect pronunciation of skin care is even worse.
And so, in cute bogan phonetic style, here is how to pronounce all those beauty brands we've been collectively mumbling/getting wrong/guessing for years.
(Underlining = emphasis.)
La Prairie: La preh-ree
Dr. Hauschka: Doctor How-shkah
Frederic Fekkai: Fray-day-rik Fek-eye
La Mer: La Mare (as in horse)
Narciso Rodriguez: Nar-sis-oh Rah-dree-gez
Issey Miyake: Ee-say Me-yah-kay
Laura Mercier: Laura Mer-si-yay
shu uemura: Shoe oo-eh-moor-ah
Kevyn Aucoin: Kevin Oh-kwan
YSL: Eve-sanh Lorr-ahn (silent 'T's)
St Tropez: San Trow-pay
And of course,
Have I missed any?